It's that time of year again.†
Sheep‡
Thousands of sheep, soft-footed, black-nosed sheep--
one by one going up the hill and over the fence--one by
one four-footed pattering up and over--one by one wiggling
their stub tails as they take the short jump and go
over--one by one silently unless for the multitudinous
drumming of their hoofs as they move on and go over--
thousands and thousands of them in the grey haze of
evening just after sundown--one by one slanting in a
long line to pass over the hill--
I am the slow, long-legged Sleepyman and I love you
sheep in Persia, California, Argentine, Australia, or
Spain--you are the thoughts that help me when I, the
Sleepyman, lay my hands on the eyelids of the children
of the world at eight o'clock every night--you thousands
and thousands of sheep in a procession of dusk making
an endless multitudinous drumming on the hills with
your hoofs.
- Carl Sandburg
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): When St. Brigid brings a basket of teeth down the chimney and if she sees a turkey's shadow, it means six more weeks of winter.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Because, despite all appearances, this is still a knitblog.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Google is a Harsh Mistress
Mom and Dad used to play S&M† and Kings in the Corner, vicious little card games that led to lots of trash talking and certain bragging rights.
Dad and the Peach have been playing Kings in the Corner, but Dad wants to branch into S&M.‡
"Didn't you say you found the rules online a couple of years ago?" he asked.
"Yeah, through the magic of Google," said I.
[SUMMARY: This is not subtle foreshadowing.§]
*************
From: "Dad"
To: "Marin"
Sent: Thursday, January 28, 2010
9:08:43 PM GMT -07:00 US/Canada Mountain
Subject: S & M
Daughter,
I googled "S & M", "Sadism & Masochism" , then put "card game" behind each... went through about a dozen pages of sex topics¶ without finding anything about the game.
Help?
dad
*************
[SUMMARY: You knew it was coming, but you still laughed.#]
I had to remind him it stands for "Spite & Malice."
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Stop it. That's my DAD you're sniggering at.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Enough! I don't laugh at your father's predilections. Of course, if you blog about them, I might.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): But you're going to laugh when you get to the punchline anyway.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): I know we're not talking about my Dad's weirdities, but does anyone else think there's a sitcom moment in the fact that he apparently continued to browse through dozens of sex sites before he called for help?
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Told you so.
@RANDOM ADDITIONAL FOOTNOTE (atted): What do you suppose this post will do to *my* Google searchability?
Dad and the Peach have been playing Kings in the Corner, but Dad wants to branch into S&M.‡
"Didn't you say you found the rules online a couple of years ago?" he asked.
"Yeah, through the magic of Google," said I.
[SUMMARY: This is not subtle foreshadowing.§]
*************
From: "Dad"
To: "Marin"
Sent: Thursday, January 28, 2010
9:08:43 PM GMT -07:00 US/Canada Mountain
Subject: S & M
Daughter,
I googled "S & M", "Sadism & Masochism" , then put "card game" behind each... went through about a dozen pages of sex topics¶ without finding anything about the game.
Help?
dad
*************
[SUMMARY: You knew it was coming, but you still laughed.#]
I had to remind him it stands for "Spite & Malice."
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Stop it. That's my DAD you're sniggering at.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Enough! I don't laugh at your father's predilections. Of course, if you blog about them, I might.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): But you're going to laugh when you get to the punchline anyway.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): I know we're not talking about my Dad's weirdities, but does anyone else think there's a sitcom moment in the fact that he apparently continued to browse through dozens of sex sites before he called for help?
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Told you so.
@RANDOM ADDITIONAL FOOTNOTE (atted): What do you suppose this post will do to *my* Google searchability?
I Laughed.
Thought For The Day:
Angels:
Women are Angels.
And, when someone breaks our wings...
we simply continue to fly... on a broomstick...
We are flexible.
Angels:
Women are Angels.
And, when someone breaks our wings...
we simply continue to fly... on a broomstick...
We are flexible.
Friday, January 15, 2010
Guess Where I Am
First clue: usually I play this game on Twitter, but I'm in a place with no cell service, no 3G... T-Mobile radio silence.*
That's right, Billings, Montana. Trying to fix something I broke five years ago because I sucked then, but I don't suck quite so much now.**
[SUMMARY: Pride is a sin. I am a saint-in-waiting.]
Also? This computer doesn't recognise CTRL-C for copy or CTRL-V for paste,*** so I can't get my normal**** footnotes on the page.
I really like Billings,***** but I'll be glad to get back to Denver where the cell phones work and the footnotes come with pretty crosses****** and swirls.*******
*FOOTNOTE (one star): This happened the last time I came to Billings. And the time before that. The definition of insanity...
**FOOTNOTE (two stars): When the person you respect most in your field, ever, tells you you screwed up, tells you you're good at what you do, tells you you screwed up, tells you you're better now than you were when you screwed up, tells you everybody screws up, but you definitely screwed up, but you shouldn't beat yourself up about it... you spend a LOT of time beating yourself up about it. I suck.
***FOOTNOTE (three stars): Yet somehow recognises CTRL-B for bold. This is the most confusing alphabet book ever.
****FOOTNOTE (four stars): OK, so there's nothing normal about my footnotes.
*****FOOTNOTE (five stars): More fantastic restaurants per capita than Manhattan and an art museum that hosts the kind of collections only old oil money can provide.
******FOOTNOTE (six stars): I'm a saint-in-training. I *need* my crosses. Besides, isn't it a little confusing when I use the asterisks for emphasis and you're off looking for the footnote that goes with "need"?
*******FOOTNOTE (seven beautiful stars... MWAHAHAHA! *bats**lightning*): How'm I s'posed to get my swerve on if there's no swerve button on this stupid computer?
That's right, Billings, Montana. Trying to fix something I broke five years ago because I sucked then, but I don't suck quite so much now.**
[SUMMARY: Pride is a sin. I am a saint-in-waiting.]
Also? This computer doesn't recognise CTRL-C for copy or CTRL-V for paste,*** so I can't get my normal**** footnotes on the page.
I really like Billings,***** but I'll be glad to get back to Denver where the cell phones work and the footnotes come with pretty crosses****** and swirls.*******
*FOOTNOTE (one star): This happened the last time I came to Billings. And the time before that. The definition of insanity...
**FOOTNOTE (two stars): When the person you respect most in your field, ever, tells you you screwed up, tells you you're good at what you do, tells you you screwed up, tells you you're better now than you were when you screwed up, tells you everybody screws up, but you definitely screwed up, but you shouldn't beat yourself up about it... you spend a LOT of time beating yourself up about it. I suck.
***FOOTNOTE (three stars): Yet somehow recognises CTRL-B for bold. This is the most confusing alphabet book ever.
****FOOTNOTE (four stars): OK, so there's nothing normal about my footnotes.
*****FOOTNOTE (five stars): More fantastic restaurants per capita than Manhattan and an art museum that hosts the kind of collections only old oil money can provide.
******FOOTNOTE (six stars): I'm a saint-in-training. I *need* my crosses. Besides, isn't it a little confusing when I use the asterisks for emphasis and you're off looking for the footnote that goes with "need"?
*******FOOTNOTE (seven beautiful stars... MWAHAHAHA! *bats**lightning*): How'm I s'posed to get my swerve on if there's no swerve button on this stupid computer?
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Best Thing I've Heard All Day
"Relax. There's no debtor's prison in America and they're not going to eat you."
Clean Sweep
OK, my inclination here is to rant and rave and piss and moan and spit and claw and scream†...
[SUMMARY: My checklist for crazy.]
...but I'm going zen.%
The zero comments for the last three years, that's a fresh, clean start.
We can all go forward like we've never spoken of balloon animal sex and thermocromatic glass and past indiscretions and knitterly wiles.
Like a kid in a new school, it's a little scary, but each of us can invent a comment persona anew.‡ Nobody needs to know. There's no evidence.
[SUMMARY: *tick* *tick* *tick*]
JS-Kit can take their Echo and their promises and shove them up their collective ass.§ They bought Haloscan, promised wonderful things, told me numerous times I had to upgrade or lose everything and NEVER got it all working.
Consequently, other than Yvette's comment on kidrobot,@ anything that's happened over in the comment section for the last... three years is gone. I'm sorry if you commented in the last week and I missed you.
In the end, the only solution was to remove them entirely, including all the comments ever. I'll just use the plain vanilla Blogger comment option. Suits me just fine.
[SUMMARY: *sniff*]
The grapes were probably sour anyway.¶
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): In other words, just an average Wednesday.
%FOOTNOTE (percented): What a theological goulash... the perennial candidate for sainthood going zen.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): It can be like that time at camp when you told all your bunkmates you were a wildly popular and sought-after designer of mazes and the adoring throngs kept you up all night every night begging for more of your confounding and elegant creations. Maybe I'm projecting.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Don't start. That *is* the zen version of what I feel about JS-Kit right now.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): Which somehow made it through the gauntlet to the Blogger comment thingie. Yvette has superpowers.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Plain vanilla and sour grapes. A taste treat whose time has come.
[SUMMARY: My checklist for crazy.]
...but I'm going zen.%
The zero comments for the last three years, that's a fresh, clean start.
We can all go forward like we've never spoken of balloon animal sex and thermocromatic glass and past indiscretions and knitterly wiles.
Like a kid in a new school, it's a little scary, but each of us can invent a comment persona anew.‡ Nobody needs to know. There's no evidence.
[SUMMARY: *tick* *tick* *tick*]
JS-Kit can take their Echo and their promises and shove them up their collective ass.§ They bought Haloscan, promised wonderful things, told me numerous times I had to upgrade or lose everything and NEVER got it all working.
Consequently, other than Yvette's comment on kidrobot,@ anything that's happened over in the comment section for the last... three years is gone. I'm sorry if you commented in the last week and I missed you.
In the end, the only solution was to remove them entirely, including all the comments ever. I'll just use the plain vanilla Blogger comment option. Suits me just fine.
[SUMMARY: *sniff*]
The grapes were probably sour anyway.¶
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): In other words, just an average Wednesday.
%FOOTNOTE (percented): What a theological goulash... the perennial candidate for sainthood going zen.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): It can be like that time at camp when you told all your bunkmates you were a wildly popular and sought-after designer of mazes and the adoring throngs kept you up all night every night begging for more of your confounding and elegant creations. Maybe I'm projecting.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Don't start. That *is* the zen version of what I feel about JS-Kit right now.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): Which somehow made it through the gauntlet to the Blogger comment thingie. Yvette has superpowers.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Plain vanilla and sour grapes. A taste treat whose time has come.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Aaaaand...
...that's as far as I got Tuesday.
Shiny† new speedy computer and psychofast N+ wireless router‡ that arrived at Chez Barfly last night§ should help this absence thing.
Meanwhile, a little news: Kidrobot, a NY toy company that went viral¶ and exploded into a designer toy company with its own line of clothing, is moving to Boulder.
I know that may not tickle you so much now,# but just look!
Sleepy Bear Titus from the kidrobot website
Man-eating skull bear with a spork!
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Stainless steel finish. Which I partly got because it's shiny and partly because, for some stupid reason, the stainless one has an extra year of warranty for an extra $40, so it seemed the economic choice as well as the aesthetic one.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): I have about zero idea what that means in practical terms -- mostly it's new, fast and shiny, and that's what life's all about.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Don't get me started on the shipping clusterfuck that happened with that... suffice to say that a truly frustrating and horrible, hungry day ended with me sitting with the fastest wireless router known to man purring contentedly on a shiny new supercompter next to Vol 1 of The Complete Calvin & Hobbes while the BCS National Championship game played. I probably cashed in a ton of kharma points for that last hour of the day.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): I'm probably not using that right. Like "hot mess," I have my version, the cool kids have theirs.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Hey! It's AntiM! Give it a minute and you WILL BE TICKLED.
Shiny† new speedy computer and psychofast N+ wireless router‡ that arrived at Chez Barfly last night§ should help this absence thing.
Meanwhile, a little news: Kidrobot, a NY toy company that went viral¶ and exploded into a designer toy company with its own line of clothing, is moving to Boulder.
I know that may not tickle you so much now,# but just look!
Sleepy Bear Titus from the kidrobot website
Man-eating skull bear with a spork!
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Stainless steel finish. Which I partly got because it's shiny and partly because, for some stupid reason, the stainless one has an extra year of warranty for an extra $40, so it seemed the economic choice as well as the aesthetic one.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): I have about zero idea what that means in practical terms -- mostly it's new, fast and shiny, and that's what life's all about.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Don't get me started on the shipping clusterfuck that happened with that... suffice to say that a truly frustrating and horrible, hungry day ended with me sitting with the fastest wireless router known to man purring contentedly on a shiny new supercompter next to Vol 1 of The Complete Calvin & Hobbes while the BCS National Championship game played. I probably cashed in a ton of kharma points for that last hour of the day.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): I'm probably not using that right. Like "hot mess," I have my version, the cool kids have theirs.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Hey! It's AntiM! Give it a minute and you WILL BE TICKLED.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
This Morning
I looked at myself in the mirror and said, "I. Will blog. Today."
"Damnit," I added.
Despite the fact that I left the office at 7:30 last night and came in at 6:45 this morning, there were five emails requiring my attention when I got in this morning.
For fuck's sake.
[SUMMARY: Some excuses are more equal than others.]
So let's catch up a little, shall we? That'll be good for a pig-lick of a blogpost and will probably take up a lot of space, even if I were 2 use Prince-speak.
*tick* *tick* *tick*
"Damnit," I added.
Despite the fact that I left the office at 7:30 last night and came in at 6:45 this morning, there were five emails requiring my attention when I got in this morning.
For fuck's sake.
[SUMMARY: Some excuses are more equal than others.]
So let's catch up a little, shall we? That'll be good for a pig-lick of a blogpost and will probably take up a lot of space, even if I were 2 use Prince-speak.
*tick* *tick* *tick*
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Holiday Conversations with Father
Marin: Omigosh! I didn't know there was a book on Bill Watterson!†
Father: I know.
Brother: Dude, you got her a book? That's pretty gutsy.
Marin: Yeah! You got me a book? Me?
Father: If you had known the book was out, I would have heard about it from you.‡
And that, my friends, sums up many, many aspects of my life, my personality and my relationship with my family.§
[SUMMARY: You're welcome.]
And happy holidays.
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): With the inscription, "Maybe you'll finally find out why Calvin & Hobbes disappeared." My father knows what troubles me.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Don't tell, but I will actually completely clam up about something -- even hid its existence -- if I want to get it for somebody else for Christmas or birthday. Wouldn't it have been funny if I got that same book for Dad for Christmas?
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Deep stuff, people. Fitting for end-of-year-end-of-decade rumination.
Father: I know.
Brother: Dude, you got her a book? That's pretty gutsy.
Marin: Yeah! You got me a book? Me?
Father: If you had known the book was out, I would have heard about it from you.‡
And that, my friends, sums up many, many aspects of my life, my personality and my relationship with my family.§
[SUMMARY: You're welcome.]
And happy holidays.
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): With the inscription, "Maybe you'll finally find out why Calvin & Hobbes disappeared." My father knows what troubles me.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Don't tell, but I will actually completely clam up about something -- even hid its existence -- if I want to get it for somebody else for Christmas or birthday. Wouldn't it have been funny if I got that same book for Dad for Christmas?
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Deep stuff, people. Fitting for end-of-year-end-of-decade rumination.
Monday, December 21, 2009
I Shill, Therefore I Am
At least this time I'm selfish about it.
For the first time in my writerly life, I entered a writing contest.† Brother told me a couple of years ago that I should, and I've been following a particular outfit for awhile, thinking someday it would be fun to enter.‡
[SUMMARY: I am a complex and deliberate creature.@]
NYC Midnight sponsors Tweet Me a Story, a contest wherein entrants tell a story in 140 characters or less.§
There were¶ twenty groups in the first round, each consisting of about 26 people. Each group got a word which had to be used in the story, unaltered.# Each group member could submit up to three stories for consideration.
That particular round ended on December 8.
Then the panel of esteemed judges†† deliberated and picked 25 stories out of each group.
[SUMMARY: The suspense builds...]
From here, the top voted story in each group will go to the final round, along with four stories chosen by said panel of esteemed judges, for a total of 100 contestants in the final round.
They are now open for voting on the first round.‡‡
The final round will also be open to voting,§§ and the top voted story will receive $100, plus a story chosen by our now-familiar panel of esteemed judges will receive $100.¶¶
As it turns out,## all three of my entries in the first round made the judges' cut and now we're up for voting.
[SUMMARY: TA-DAAAAAAAA!]
So, y'know, if you find my words worthy, I'd be delighted for your vote.%
Should you wish to tell all your family and friends that all you want for Chrismakwanzakuh is for your dear old AntiM to go to the Tweet Me a Story gold medal round, that'd be cool too.†††
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Well, except for the literary magazine in college. I should probably mention -- both in the interest of full disclosure and under the auspices of blowing my own horn -- that I flat out won that one. They gave me 100 unexpected dollars, then promptly took it away for library fees.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Sometimes it takes me time to deliberate about important stuff.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): I can hear you laughing.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Duh.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Note the clever and subtle application of past tense to let you know where we are in this saga. That's why I'm the big rock star writer I am today -- subtlety and cleverness.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): If the word is penguin, you can't make it penguins or penguin's, for instance.
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): I believe that is the exact term used on the NYC Midnight website. I've come to think of them as The Panel of Esteemed Judges in a big, echo-y god voice.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): All that foreshadowing from the first sentence is coming home to roost. Damn, I have a knack for this literary device stuff.
§§FOOTNOTE (what goes around...): So we may come back to this in a couple of weeks.
¶¶FOOTNOTE (kaching kaching): I know it doesn't sound like much, but that's some fine vodka or cashmere. Maybe a little of both. And this time, there are no library fees to be deducted.
##FOOTNOTE (pounding the subtle into your head): Did you notice the subtle again? And the humble? It's a big ol' whack in the head of subtle and humble.
†††FOOTNOTE (holy cats, that's a lot of cross to bear): That's me, Group 17, word: "witness." You have until, say, January 4 at midnight eastern time.
‡‡‡FOOTNOTE (the path to sainthood is bumpy): Turns out saints are not above stuffing the ballot box.
For the first time in my writerly life, I entered a writing contest.† Brother told me a couple of years ago that I should, and I've been following a particular outfit for awhile, thinking someday it would be fun to enter.‡
[SUMMARY: I am a complex and deliberate creature.@]
NYC Midnight sponsors Tweet Me a Story, a contest wherein entrants tell a story in 140 characters or less.§
There were¶ twenty groups in the first round, each consisting of about 26 people. Each group got a word which had to be used in the story, unaltered.# Each group member could submit up to three stories for consideration.
That particular round ended on December 8.
Then the panel of esteemed judges†† deliberated and picked 25 stories out of each group.
[SUMMARY: The suspense builds...]
From here, the top voted story in each group will go to the final round, along with four stories chosen by said panel of esteemed judges, for a total of 100 contestants in the final round.
They are now open for voting on the first round.‡‡
The final round will also be open to voting,§§ and the top voted story will receive $100, plus a story chosen by our now-familiar panel of esteemed judges will receive $100.¶¶
As it turns out,## all three of my entries in the first round made the judges' cut and now we're up for voting.
[SUMMARY: TA-DAAAAAAAA!]
So, y'know, if you find my words worthy, I'd be delighted for your vote.%
Should you wish to tell all your family and friends that all you want for Chrismakwanzakuh is for your dear old AntiM to go to the Tweet Me a Story gold medal round, that'd be cool too.†††
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Well, except for the literary magazine in college. I should probably mention -- both in the interest of full disclosure and under the auspices of blowing my own horn -- that I flat out won that one. They gave me 100 unexpected dollars, then promptly took it away for library fees.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Sometimes it takes me time to deliberate about important stuff.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): I can hear you laughing.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Duh.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Note the clever and subtle application of past tense to let you know where we are in this saga. That's why I'm the big rock star writer I am today -- subtlety and cleverness.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): If the word is penguin, you can't make it penguins or penguin's, for instance.
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): I believe that is the exact term used on the NYC Midnight website. I've come to think of them as The Panel of Esteemed Judges in a big, echo-y god voice.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): All that foreshadowing from the first sentence is coming home to roost. Damn, I have a knack for this literary device stuff.
§§FOOTNOTE (what goes around...): So we may come back to this in a couple of weeks.
¶¶FOOTNOTE (kaching kaching): I know it doesn't sound like much, but that's some fine vodka or cashmere. Maybe a little of both. And this time, there are no library fees to be deducted.
##FOOTNOTE (pounding the subtle into your head): Did you notice the subtle again? And the humble? It's a big ol' whack in the head of subtle and humble.
†††FOOTNOTE (holy cats, that's a lot of cross to bear): That's me, Group 17, word: "witness." You have until, say, January 4 at midnight eastern time.
‡‡‡FOOTNOTE (the path to sainthood is bumpy): Turns out saints are not above stuffing the ballot box.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
BRILLIANT!
So I was checking out the list of vendors participating in the second annual free shipping day,† and one in particular lept out at me.‡
I could so be their spokesblogger.§
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Now that the holiday season goes Kay Jewelers Holiday Ad Kick-Off Day (Oct 15), Store Decoration Day (Oct 30), Chiropractor's Card Mailing Day (Nov 15), Black Thursday (formerly known as Thanksgiving), Black Friday, Cyber Monday, Free Shipping in Time for Christmas Day (Dec 17)... our advent calendars are going to have to be displayed in installments.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Practically grabbed me around the throat. Does anybody else get abnormally tickled to see their name? Or is it just us weird name folks?
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): At *least* their patron saint.
I could so be their spokesblogger.§
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Now that the holiday season goes Kay Jewelers Holiday Ad Kick-Off Day (Oct 15), Store Decoration Day (Oct 30), Chiropractor's Card Mailing Day (Nov 15), Black Thursday (formerly known as Thanksgiving), Black Friday, Cyber Monday, Free Shipping in Time for Christmas Day (Dec 17)... our advent calendars are going to have to be displayed in installments.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Practically grabbed me around the throat. Does anybody else get abnormally tickled to see their name? Or is it just us weird name folks?
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): At *least* their patron saint.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Friday, December 4, 2009
You're No Gypsy, Fredo
I thought of a chicken thing!†
[SUMMARY: You are so excited!]
I flipped on the TiVi Monday night and it warmed up‡ to the beginning of Wheel of Fortune. Pat was asking the contestants to tell us a little bit about themselves. The first guy wanted to say, "Hi!" to his four dogs and his wife§ and Pat asked him a couple of leading questions about the dogs.
The next contestant was a woman who mentioned her husband and kids, and Pat, tongue-in-cheek, asked if she had any pets she wanted to say, "Hi!" to.
"We have seven chickens, Pat."
"Seven chickens? What are their name? Do they have names?"
"They do, Pat. There's Kung Pao, Fricassee, Alfredo¶..."
I thought it was pretty funny.
[SUMMARY: You are so laughing!]
What's more, I thought, "Chickens! I have to remember to share that with all my blogfriends! 'Cause it's *chickens*!"
Then four hours passed and I lost it, but trying to remember where I put my Chase credit card this morning, I remembered the chicken story.#
[SUMMARY: You are so lucky!]
In other chicken news, Red, most-favoured pirate chicken of Marybeth, may be a rooster. Which would make him ineligible for city living. And Marybeth would have to send him to live on a farm.
Just like your dad did with your dog when you were four.
[SUMMARY: Euphemism?&]
And guess what? I got a lovely perfume sample in the mail from Ineke††, so perfume too!%
It's Friday. It's a good day. Keep your fingers crossed for Red.
*************
Field Notes from Paris - Ineke
Marin says: Love may not be too strong a word.
It's funny because this evolves in my head as something maybe I shouldn't like and I don't know why -- like a guilty pleasure, only I can't even tell you why I'd be sheepish about it.‡‡
There's a splash of sweet lime in the beginning. Like almost all citrus, it levels out quickly and leads to the most intoxicating, elusive blend of... what? I would swear there's a touch of patchouli in there, but I can't quite catch it. It's not as earthy as some patchouli, not as dark as some patchouli and definitely not as strong as most patchouli. A patchouli of song and light?§§
Something woody, but I can't put my finger on what breed of wood. Tobacco flower, definitely -- it's one of my best scents and I can usually pick it out of a crowd. Maybe the wood is tobacco leaf. It has a sweetish tang I associate with tobacco.
The more it settles in, the more it reminds me of some of the exotic pipe tobaccos I've sniffed in my years of trying to find gifts for my father.
Then the sweeter, rounder elements mellow back in the mix and an oil slick of... leather? Salt? Clean sweat?¶¶ settles on top.
I think this smells the way I want a man to smell, but I find it not unfeminine. Maybe there's a white flower floating around, keeping it from being all horses and testosterone. In any case, it may be the perfect unisex fragrance.
Ineke says: Field notes from Paris is inspired by Ineke's halcyon days studying perfumery in Paris and Versailles. It captures the romantic, nostalgic feeling of sitting at a cafe and writing in a journal while lingering for hours over a cafe creme.
This "woody oriental" structure combines the warmth of tobacco flower and leaf$ with the vintage perfumery notes of coriander seed@, patchouli$ and tonka bean. Field Notes from Paris is an enigmatic scent with a warm, comforting presence.##
Top notes: Coriander Seed, Orange Flower, Bergamot
Middle: Tobacco Flower & Leaf, Patchouli, Cedar
Base: Tonka Bean, leather, Beeswax, Vanilla
Hans says:
Marin: "I really like this one. I probably shouldn't tell you that."
Hans: "Oh, great. Now I'm not objective. Ooooh. I like it too. It's got some spice@, like... cinnamon and... spice. And everything nice.
"You can quote me on that."
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Which sounds like the tawdry confession of a dirty little fetish.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Remember back in the day when the TiVi had to warm up -- and cool down? It kinda tickles me that my state-of-the-2006-art HDTV has to warm up like when I was a kid.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): In that order.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Hence, the Fredo blogtitle.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): And tomorrow, when I'm trying to find my cookie scooper or my size 9 Addy Turbos, I'll probably run across my Chase credit card.
&FOOTNOTE (ampersanded): Actually, Marybeth does have a friend with extraurban farm space who could take Red. So not entirely a euphemism. Then again, said friend said she couldn't guarantee Red wouldn't end up as Sunday dinner. The suspense continues...
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): From whom I got the lovely A-E scent collection last year, only I can't find the blogpost to link to to remind you because they made me go to IE 2, the stone age version, at work and the search function doesn't work anymore.
%FOOTNOTE (percented): I saw the headline for this on Nathan's blog and I couldn't read it because I didn't want his review to influence me, so I've been cold and lonely and Nathanless for *weeks*.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): Sheep! Like knitting! WOOT for the KNITBLOG!
§§FOOTNOTE (spin goths! SPIN!): Did you hear that? That's the sound of a thousand goths spinning in their graves.
¶¶FOOTNOTE (nod with me): These scents are TOTALLY related.
$FOOTNOTE (on the money!): I'm giving myself a little leeway on mixing up sweet lime with orange blossom and bergamot, but deducting points for not recognising tonka bean. It's a wash.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): Two important notes (ha! pun!) on coriander: 1) I don't have the slightest idea what coriander seed smells like, as it turns out, and 2) Hans now claims that the "spice" he was talking about was coriander seed.
##FOOTNOTE (holiday pounds): That's what I said! Not as succinctly, but surely that's what I was talking about when I said it smelled the way I'd like a man to smell.
†††FOOTNOTE ():
[SUMMARY: You are so excited!]
I flipped on the TiVi Monday night and it warmed up‡ to the beginning of Wheel of Fortune. Pat was asking the contestants to tell us a little bit about themselves. The first guy wanted to say, "Hi!" to his four dogs and his wife§ and Pat asked him a couple of leading questions about the dogs.
The next contestant was a woman who mentioned her husband and kids, and Pat, tongue-in-cheek, asked if she had any pets she wanted to say, "Hi!" to.
"We have seven chickens, Pat."
"Seven chickens? What are their name? Do they have names?"
"They do, Pat. There's Kung Pao, Fricassee, Alfredo¶..."
I thought it was pretty funny.
[SUMMARY: You are so laughing!]
What's more, I thought, "Chickens! I have to remember to share that with all my blogfriends! 'Cause it's *chickens*!"
Then four hours passed and I lost it, but trying to remember where I put my Chase credit card this morning, I remembered the chicken story.#
[SUMMARY: You are so lucky!]
In other chicken news, Red, most-favoured pirate chicken of Marybeth, may be a rooster. Which would make him ineligible for city living. And Marybeth would have to send him to live on a farm.
Just like your dad did with your dog when you were four.
[SUMMARY: Euphemism?&]
And guess what? I got a lovely perfume sample in the mail from Ineke††, so perfume too!%
It's Friday. It's a good day. Keep your fingers crossed for Red.
*************
Field Notes from Paris - Ineke
Marin says: Love may not be too strong a word.
It's funny because this evolves in my head as something maybe I shouldn't like and I don't know why -- like a guilty pleasure, only I can't even tell you why I'd be sheepish about it.‡‡
There's a splash of sweet lime in the beginning. Like almost all citrus, it levels out quickly and leads to the most intoxicating, elusive blend of... what? I would swear there's a touch of patchouli in there, but I can't quite catch it. It's not as earthy as some patchouli, not as dark as some patchouli and definitely not as strong as most patchouli. A patchouli of song and light?§§
Something woody, but I can't put my finger on what breed of wood. Tobacco flower, definitely -- it's one of my best scents and I can usually pick it out of a crowd. Maybe the wood is tobacco leaf. It has a sweetish tang I associate with tobacco.
The more it settles in, the more it reminds me of some of the exotic pipe tobaccos I've sniffed in my years of trying to find gifts for my father.
Then the sweeter, rounder elements mellow back in the mix and an oil slick of... leather? Salt? Clean sweat?¶¶ settles on top.
I think this smells the way I want a man to smell, but I find it not unfeminine. Maybe there's a white flower floating around, keeping it from being all horses and testosterone. In any case, it may be the perfect unisex fragrance.
Ineke says: Field notes from Paris is inspired by Ineke's halcyon days studying perfumery in Paris and Versailles. It captures the romantic, nostalgic feeling of sitting at a cafe and writing in a journal while lingering for hours over a cafe creme.
This "woody oriental" structure combines the warmth of tobacco flower and leaf$ with the vintage perfumery notes of coriander seed@, patchouli$ and tonka bean. Field Notes from Paris is an enigmatic scent with a warm, comforting presence.##
Top notes: Coriander Seed, Orange Flower, Bergamot
Middle: Tobacco Flower & Leaf, Patchouli, Cedar
Base: Tonka Bean, leather, Beeswax, Vanilla
Hans says:
Marin: "I really like this one. I probably shouldn't tell you that."
Hans: "Oh, great. Now I'm not objective. Ooooh. I like it too. It's got some spice@, like... cinnamon and... spice. And everything nice.
"You can quote me on that."
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Which sounds like the tawdry confession of a dirty little fetish.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Remember back in the day when the TiVi had to warm up -- and cool down? It kinda tickles me that my state-of-the-2006-art HDTV has to warm up like when I was a kid.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): In that order.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Hence, the Fredo blogtitle.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): And tomorrow, when I'm trying to find my cookie scooper or my size 9 Addy Turbos, I'll probably run across my Chase credit card.
&FOOTNOTE (ampersanded): Actually, Marybeth does have a friend with extraurban farm space who could take Red. So not entirely a euphemism. Then again, said friend said she couldn't guarantee Red wouldn't end up as Sunday dinner. The suspense continues...
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): From whom I got the lovely A-E scent collection last year, only I can't find the blogpost to link to to remind you because they made me go to IE 2, the stone age version, at work and the search function doesn't work anymore.
%FOOTNOTE (percented): I saw the headline for this on Nathan's blog and I couldn't read it because I didn't want his review to influence me, so I've been cold and lonely and Nathanless for *weeks*.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): Sheep! Like knitting! WOOT for the KNITBLOG!
§§FOOTNOTE (spin goths! SPIN!): Did you hear that? That's the sound of a thousand goths spinning in their graves.
¶¶FOOTNOTE (nod with me): These scents are TOTALLY related.
$FOOTNOTE (on the money!): I'm giving myself a little leeway on mixing up sweet lime with orange blossom and bergamot, but deducting points for not recognising tonka bean. It's a wash.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): Two important notes (ha! pun!) on coriander: 1) I don't have the slightest idea what coriander seed smells like, as it turns out, and 2) Hans now claims that the "spice" he was talking about was coriander seed.
##FOOTNOTE (holiday pounds): That's what I said! Not as succinctly, but surely that's what I was talking about when I said it smelled the way I'd like a man to smell.
†††FOOTNOTE ():
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Reunion
Have you ever run into someone, say, in line at the grocery store... someone you haven't seen in ten or fifteen years?
In the two or three interruptable minutes you have, you try to catch up.†
That's how I feel right now.
It's not really that anything major has happened that anybody needs to know about. That would be easy. It's that this blog isn't about major things. This is about teeny, tiny little muses of fluff. There have been a LOT of fluff muses in the last *mumblemonthormoremumble*.
[SUMMARY: Facebook lifestyle‡ got me down.]
I really wish I could share some of the funny, witty, clever, wicked, brilliant thoughts I've had,§ but I only remember them for about four hours¶ and they're all gone now.
So let's start with knitting, since once upon a time, this was STILL A KNITBLOG.
I finally finished the last two of the six-at-once socks.# I wear them often.†† I'm mostly pleased with how they look, but I have to admit that the Shibui sock is so tightly twisted that it's noticably rough on the feet. I know they'll last longer than nice, soft socks, but I think I'll be seeking nice, soft sock yarn from here on out.
I am currently knitting a fabulous sweater‡‡ for Dr. Doom. I'm so excited about it I'm practically vibrating, but I think I'll wait until it's done so you're all surprised and stuff.
[SUMMARY: Blah blah knit blah blah blah knit knit blah.]
I get to go on an airplane next week. The payoff for being allowed to fly on company dollars is that I have to go to Houston. And answer questions from potential buyers at an auction. Two days of misery, but did I mention I get to ride an airplane?
[SUMMARY: The glamourous life of a petroleum landman.]
I gently declined to spend Thanksgiving with my family and ordered my dinner from a local gourmet market. I shopped Old Navy at noon, had some dinner and went to the Broncos game by myself.§§
TRAGIC NOTE: This dreck has taken me two days¶¶ to slog through. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I think we should all cut our losses and look at something shiny. Tomorrow may be a better day.
To make up for it, please help yourself to one free holiday song download every day in December from Amazon.com.##
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): All the while wondering if you should mention or avoid that night backstage with the tangled scrim and the masking tape.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): We can blame Facebook for part of this. Facebook sucks a lot of time out of me. I'm trying to learn to control it, but it's been a long road to recovery.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): You just *know* I've had dozens of brilliant, clever thoughts.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Old... feeble...
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Though I didn't bind off loose enough and they get stuck partway up my calf and slouch there.
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): Despite the binding and the slouching.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): And just discovered last night that in adding an inch under the arms when I put the sleeve holes on holders, I added an inch to the body of the sweater and am now trying to figure out a way to take it in by two inches that will 1) make it look like I meant to do that, and 2) be removable so he can wear it an extra year if he wants to.
§§FOOTNOTE (a fine turn of events): And have discovered that one or both of the following must happen for the Broncos to win: 1) I must go to the game by myself. 2) Van Walker can not be advertising his Bronco Slappy bandwagon fandom for his beliked Broncos on Facebook.
It has *nothing* to do with the team.
For those of you scoring at home, the Raiders should beat the Broncos by about 83 points, since I'm taking three people to that game.
¶¶FOOTNOTE (bock bock): And there aren't even any chickens.
##FOOTNOTE (murder by numbers): I'm not getting anything for this -- I just heard about it and thought I'd share.
In the two or three interruptable minutes you have, you try to catch up.†
That's how I feel right now.
It's not really that anything major has happened that anybody needs to know about. That would be easy. It's that this blog isn't about major things. This is about teeny, tiny little muses of fluff. There have been a LOT of fluff muses in the last *mumblemonthormoremumble*.
[SUMMARY: Facebook lifestyle‡ got me down.]
I really wish I could share some of the funny, witty, clever, wicked, brilliant thoughts I've had,§ but I only remember them for about four hours¶ and they're all gone now.
So let's start with knitting, since once upon a time, this was STILL A KNITBLOG.
I finally finished the last two of the six-at-once socks.# I wear them often.†† I'm mostly pleased with how they look, but I have to admit that the Shibui sock is so tightly twisted that it's noticably rough on the feet. I know they'll last longer than nice, soft socks, but I think I'll be seeking nice, soft sock yarn from here on out.
I am currently knitting a fabulous sweater‡‡ for Dr. Doom. I'm so excited about it I'm practically vibrating, but I think I'll wait until it's done so you're all surprised and stuff.
[SUMMARY: Blah blah knit blah blah blah knit knit blah.]
I get to go on an airplane next week. The payoff for being allowed to fly on company dollars is that I have to go to Houston. And answer questions from potential buyers at an auction. Two days of misery, but did I mention I get to ride an airplane?
[SUMMARY: The glamourous life of a petroleum landman.]
I gently declined to spend Thanksgiving with my family and ordered my dinner from a local gourmet market. I shopped Old Navy at noon, had some dinner and went to the Broncos game by myself.§§
TRAGIC NOTE: This dreck has taken me two days¶¶ to slog through. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I think we should all cut our losses and look at something shiny. Tomorrow may be a better day.
To make up for it, please help yourself to one free holiday song download every day in December from Amazon.com.##
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): All the while wondering if you should mention or avoid that night backstage with the tangled scrim and the masking tape.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): We can blame Facebook for part of this. Facebook sucks a lot of time out of me. I'm trying to learn to control it, but it's been a long road to recovery.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): You just *know* I've had dozens of brilliant, clever thoughts.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Old... feeble...
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Though I didn't bind off loose enough and they get stuck partway up my calf and slouch there.
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): Despite the binding and the slouching.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): And just discovered last night that in adding an inch under the arms when I put the sleeve holes on holders, I added an inch to the body of the sweater and am now trying to figure out a way to take it in by two inches that will 1) make it look like I meant to do that, and 2) be removable so he can wear it an extra year if he wants to.
§§FOOTNOTE (a fine turn of events): And have discovered that one or both of the following must happen for the Broncos to win: 1) I must go to the game by myself. 2) Van Walker can not be advertising his Bronco Slappy bandwagon fandom for his beliked Broncos on Facebook.
It has *nothing* to do with the team.
For those of you scoring at home, the Raiders should beat the Broncos by about 83 points, since I'm taking three people to that game.
¶¶FOOTNOTE (bock bock): And there aren't even any chickens.
##FOOTNOTE (murder by numbers): I'm not getting anything for this -- I just heard about it and thought I'd share.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
OMG! OMG! I WON! I WON!
The names were written on sticky notes and sealed shut.†
I put them in an empty Healthy Choice pasta cooking bowl.‡
I shook them.
Then Hans rubbed his hands together gleefully and said, "Who's going to love me? Who are you?
*rustlerustle*
"Jay!"
"Jax," I said.§
"Jax!"
Curious George, faithful pug companion of my gorgeous and sassy cousin¶ Jacquelyn, will be dining from a luxury pet dish while his mom's B-i-r-d Watcher's Weekly# magazines are neatly contained in their chrome cage.
Congratulations, Jax.
See? People really do win at the Rickety Blog.††
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Which afforded me minutes of entertainment as Hans tried to paw the winning entry open.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Experimental office lunch. I saved the bowl to see if I could cook my own pasta in it. It's been sitting on my credenza for two weeks under those auspices.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Apparently Hans crosses his Y's.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): From another... grandmother? Jax is my cousin's cousin, but the three of us make such good cousins we stick with the honourary cousin position. Besides, did you see how many words it took for me to explain that? And that's the short version. It's much easier to just go with "cousins."
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): I can only say that because she's far enough away not to smack me. Jax detests b-i-r-d-s. We can't even say the word in front of her -- that's why we spell it.
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed: And I feel like Ed McMahon.
I put them in an empty Healthy Choice pasta cooking bowl.‡
I shook them.
Then Hans rubbed his hands together gleefully and said, "Who's going to love me? Who are you?
*rustlerustle*
"Jay!"
"Jax," I said.§
"Jax!"
Curious George, faithful pug companion of my gorgeous and sassy cousin¶ Jacquelyn, will be dining from a luxury pet dish while his mom's B-i-r-d Watcher's Weekly# magazines are neatly contained in their chrome cage.
Congratulations, Jax.
See? People really do win at the Rickety Blog.††
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Which afforded me minutes of entertainment as Hans tried to paw the winning entry open.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Experimental office lunch. I saved the bowl to see if I could cook my own pasta in it. It's been sitting on my credenza for two weeks under those auspices.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Apparently Hans crosses his Y's.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): From another... grandmother? Jax is my cousin's cousin, but the three of us make such good cousins we stick with the honourary cousin position. Besides, did you see how many words it took for me to explain that? And that's the short version. It's much easier to just go with "cousins."
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): I can only say that because she's far enough away not to smack me. Jax detests b-i-r-d-s. We can't even say the word in front of her -- that's why we spell it.
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed: And I feel like Ed McMahon.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Tick Tock
Tomorrow at 3:00 pm MST,† Hans will draw a name out of a hat‡ and some lucky winner will walk off with a stunning, warming pet food dish and a sleek, modern magazine rack, courtesy of AllModern.com.
Just for the record, I'm not getting merchandise, cash or fame from this, just the satisfaction of knowing your kitty or pug or dear husband is eating food that is lovingly kept warm while not tripping over piles of knitting§ magazines.
Tell your friends.¶
XOXO
M
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Marin Standard Time, which is fifteen minutes early for everything.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Or a microwave-safe bowl. It's 80 degrees in Denverish... I don't know if we'll be able to dig up a hat for the occasion.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): ...woodworking...pig farming...Penthouse...
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Or your enemies. Perhaps you think your enemies deserve a festive, leopard-print warming pet dish.
Just for the record, I'm not getting merchandise, cash or fame from this, just the satisfaction of knowing your kitty or pug or dear husband is eating food that is lovingly kept warm while not tripping over piles of knitting§ magazines.
Tell your friends.¶
XOXO
M
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Marin Standard Time, which is fifteen minutes early for everything.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Or a microwave-safe bowl. It's 80 degrees in Denverish... I don't know if we'll be able to dig up a hat for the occasion.
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): ...woodworking...pig farming...Penthouse...
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): Or your enemies. Perhaps you think your enemies deserve a festive, leopard-print warming pet dish.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Bored of the Rings...
...has been on my bookshelf in one form or another† since 1980.
Now, finally, after 40 years,‡ the Harvard Lampoon has taken on another mega-star.
Be still my stupid sparkly beating heart.
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Well, one ratty paperback after another, really. The "form" of which I speak is mostly a matter of level of disintegration and magnitude of coffee-stained pages.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Srsly. Very Short List says so.
Now, finally, after 40 years,‡ the Harvard Lampoon has taken on another mega-star.
Be still my stupid sparkly beating heart.
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Well, one ratty paperback after another, really. The "form" of which I speak is mostly a matter of level of disintegration and magnitude of coffee-stained pages.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Srsly. Very Short List says so.
Contest! Win a Fabulous Prize!
And this isn't like the time I tried to foist my ill-fitting socks on an unsuspecting public.
No, this is a REAL prize. Hand-picked† by yours truly via the good graces of AllModern.com.
Jamie at All Modern contacted me and asked if I'd like to check out their merchandise and maybe pick out a couple of little items to give away here at the Rickety Blog.
Jamie says they love that I'm "Honest, up front and blunt."‡
[SUMMARY: And I quote.]
Is it bad that makes me chuckle just a little evilly?
Anyway, I dutifully went to peruse the websites and spent a fair chunk of free time mentally re-decorating my home.^ There's SO much I liked,% so I'm just going to share that one thing that captured my imagination more than any other:
The whole Vitra store speaks to the sleek, modern side of me.§ And the Ronan & Erwan Bouroullec Collection is like the next logical evolution of Frank Lloyd Wright.
Plus, y'know, it's like LEGOs for grown-ups.¶
You can take thos widgets above and hook them together to make screens like this:
Or maybe like this...
Or maybe in a sleek, skeletal Christmas tree, which can then be covered in tiny knitted sweaters and traveling lights with a blinking, musical angel on top.#
Class through kitsch is one of my favourite emotions.††
[SUMMARY: The self-aware cop to kitsch first.]
So now maybe you're wondering what I have for you, oh my imaginary friends.‡‡
One lucky winner, residing in the US or Canada,§§ will receive these oddly useful things.
The first, a luxury pet dish with a warming function.¶¶ Simply put hot water in the reservoir in the bottom and your Fluffy or Fido can enjoy a home-warmed meal.
Plus, y'know, cute animal print.##
And the other part of our prize package is this sleek, unobtrusive magazine rack. You can put it on the floor, on a side table... and don't even *try* to tell me you don't have a couple dozen knitting/quilting/cooking††† magazines strewn about your living room that could use a little wrangling.
Plus, y'know... shiny.
So here are the rules:
[SUMMARY: There are always rules.]
1) Comment on this post for entry -- BE SURE TO ENTER YOUR EMAIL. If I can't find you, it's going to be hard to shower you with gifts.
2) One entry per person, except in the case where you drive my readership through the roof by mentioning this on your blog or sending other people to me.‡‡‡
SO...
3) You can earn an extra entry by posting a link to this post and putting a link to that link in the comments on this post.§§§
OR...
4) You can earn an extra entry for each person who comments and says you sent them.
A winner will be drawn randomly@ on Wednesday, November 11.¶¶¶
What are you waiting for? Don't you want your kitty to have warm kibble?###
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Srsly. That wee tiny OCD flap in my brain agonised for ages over the perfect, oddly useful goods. I figure everybody can use a nice magazine rack and most of y'all have a pet or two -- or know somebody who does and might appreciate a luxury pet dish. As I mention later in these footnotes, Christmas is right around the corner.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Perhaps they caught my delicate snort at the Neiman Marcus Christmas book bargain offerings.
^FOOTNOTE (careted): And mentally knocking down the neighbour's walls so I have room for all the couches and chairs I want.
%FOOTNOTE (percented): They have pet stuff and kid stuff (ask me how much I love the chalkboard dots) and modern bedding (ask me how much I love the Missoni collection) and accessories and... well, there was a lot to re-decorate with. Is redecorate hyphenated?
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Which is locked in a lifelong death struggle with the cute animals and things-that-sing-and-light-up-and-are-possibly-covered-in-skulls side of me.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): There would never be a better segueway than this one, so I must take this tangent: remember the Frank Lloyd Wright LEGO sets I was lusting after? The first two are released! Just in time for Christmas! OK, one was released in May, but still.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): You can take the girl out of the trailer park...
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): All due respect to Truvy Jones.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): Even IRL friends can play!
§§FOOTNOTE (smug and twisty): Sorry, Ally. If you wanted to play with the cool kids, you shoulda stayed on the continent. See? "Expatriate" doesn't sound so glamourous now, does it?
¶¶FOOTNOTE (two thumbs sideways!): I'm not making this up.
##FOOTNOTE (zebra crossing): Also available in zebra print!
†††FOOTNOTE (three more crosses to bear): ...fishing/watch-collecting/nudie...
‡‡‡FOOTNOTE (how did I get off track?): *snort* I suspect if I were that worried about readership, I would've stopped posting pictures of zombie chickens a long time ago. Hey, Jamie at All Modern was nice enough to say nice things about my rickety little corner of the Innernets, so I'd like to give them as much exposure as possible. It doesn't hurt that they have wonderful things like LEGOs for grown-ups and chalkboard dots either.
§§§FOOTNOTE (triple spin zoom meta!): Oh, baby, that's not just meta... that's meta in the mirror.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): Hans will probably be involved.
¶¶¶FOOTNOTE (three-gun salute to Mom): To commemorate Mom's second birthday; Dad thought it was the 11th the first year they were married, and Mom was in sniffly, silent martyr mode from the 7th -- her actual birthday -- until the 11th when he threw her a surprise party. As punishment, she made us all celebrate on the 7th and the 11th ever after.
###FOOTNOTE (pound pound pound kitty with entitlement issues): Please don't tell Quill (a/k/a Cat for Scale) about this. If he knows there's potential for hot meals, I'll never hear the end of it.
No, this is a REAL prize. Hand-picked† by yours truly via the good graces of AllModern.com.
Jamie at All Modern contacted me and asked if I'd like to check out their merchandise and maybe pick out a couple of little items to give away here at the Rickety Blog.
Jamie says they love that I'm "Honest, up front and blunt."‡
[SUMMARY: And I quote.]
Is it bad that makes me chuckle just a little evilly?
Anyway, I dutifully went to peruse the websites and spent a fair chunk of free time mentally re-decorating my home.^ There's SO much I liked,% so I'm just going to share that one thing that captured my imagination more than any other:
The whole Vitra store speaks to the sleek, modern side of me.§ And the Ronan & Erwan Bouroullec Collection is like the next logical evolution of Frank Lloyd Wright.
Plus, y'know, it's like LEGOs for grown-ups.¶
You can take thos widgets above and hook them together to make screens like this:
Or maybe like this...
Or maybe in a sleek, skeletal Christmas tree, which can then be covered in tiny knitted sweaters and traveling lights with a blinking, musical angel on top.#
Class through kitsch is one of my favourite emotions.††
[SUMMARY: The self-aware cop to kitsch first.]
So now maybe you're wondering what I have for you, oh my imaginary friends.‡‡
One lucky winner, residing in the US or Canada,§§ will receive these oddly useful things.
The first, a luxury pet dish with a warming function.¶¶ Simply put hot water in the reservoir in the bottom and your Fluffy or Fido can enjoy a home-warmed meal.
Plus, y'know, cute animal print.##
And the other part of our prize package is this sleek, unobtrusive magazine rack. You can put it on the floor, on a side table... and don't even *try* to tell me you don't have a couple dozen knitting/quilting/cooking††† magazines strewn about your living room that could use a little wrangling.
Plus, y'know... shiny.
So here are the rules:
[SUMMARY: There are always rules.]
1) Comment on this post for entry -- BE SURE TO ENTER YOUR EMAIL. If I can't find you, it's going to be hard to shower you with gifts.
2) One entry per person, except in the case where you drive my readership through the roof by mentioning this on your blog or sending other people to me.‡‡‡
SO...
3) You can earn an extra entry by posting a link to this post and putting a link to that link in the comments on this post.§§§
OR...
4) You can earn an extra entry for each person who comments and says you sent them.
A winner will be drawn randomly@ on Wednesday, November 11.¶¶¶
What are you waiting for? Don't you want your kitty to have warm kibble?###
†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Srsly. That wee tiny OCD flap in my brain agonised for ages over the perfect, oddly useful goods. I figure everybody can use a nice magazine rack and most of y'all have a pet or two -- or know somebody who does and might appreciate a luxury pet dish. As I mention later in these footnotes, Christmas is right around the corner.
‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Perhaps they caught my delicate snort at the Neiman Marcus Christmas book bargain offerings.
^FOOTNOTE (careted): And mentally knocking down the neighbour's walls so I have room for all the couches and chairs I want.
%FOOTNOTE (percented): They have pet stuff and kid stuff (ask me how much I love the chalkboard dots) and modern bedding (ask me how much I love the Missoni collection) and accessories and... well, there was a lot to re-decorate with. Is redecorate hyphenated?
§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Which is locked in a lifelong death struggle with the cute animals and things-that-sing-and-light-up-and-are-possibly-covered-in-skulls side of me.
¶FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): There would never be a better segueway than this one, so I must take this tangent: remember the Frank Lloyd Wright LEGO sets I was lusting after? The first two are released! Just in time for Christmas! OK, one was released in May, but still.
#FOOTNOTE (pounded): You can take the girl out of the trailer park...
††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): All due respect to Truvy Jones.
‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): Even IRL friends can play!
§§FOOTNOTE (smug and twisty): Sorry, Ally. If you wanted to play with the cool kids, you shoulda stayed on the continent. See? "Expatriate" doesn't sound so glamourous now, does it?
¶¶FOOTNOTE (two thumbs sideways!): I'm not making this up.
##FOOTNOTE (zebra crossing): Also available in zebra print!
†††FOOTNOTE (three more crosses to bear): ...fishing/watch-collecting/nudie...
‡‡‡FOOTNOTE (how did I get off track?): *snort* I suspect if I were that worried about readership, I would've stopped posting pictures of zombie chickens a long time ago. Hey, Jamie at All Modern was nice enough to say nice things about my rickety little corner of the Innernets, so I'd like to give them as much exposure as possible. It doesn't hurt that they have wonderful things like LEGOs for grown-ups and chalkboard dots either.
§§§FOOTNOTE (triple spin zoom meta!): Oh, baby, that's not just meta... that's meta in the mirror.
@FOOTNOTE (atted): Hans will probably be involved.
¶¶¶FOOTNOTE (three-gun salute to Mom): To commemorate Mom's second birthday; Dad thought it was the 11th the first year they were married, and Mom was in sniffly, silent martyr mode from the 7th -- her actual birthday -- until the 11th when he threw her a surprise party. As punishment, she made us all celebrate on the 7th and the 11th ever after.
###FOOTNOTE (pound pound pound kitty with entitlement issues): Please don't tell Quill (a/k/a Cat for Scale) about this. If he knows there's potential for hot meals, I'll never hear the end of it.
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