Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Silver Lining


You may remember last year's Fashion Denver, um... palooza... at the Oriental Theatre.

You may remember my little slurp of the Vamp girls.

Well, I didn't slurp nearly hard enough.

I completely failed to mention how their totally sweet purses are eco-friendly,§ how the company is owned and operated by women, how they're all handmade right here in Colorado,% how Deanna and Tara are warm and friendly and fabulous and they believe in cocktails.#

[SUMMARY: *slurp!*]

And now I can add that they fed my knee-jerk love of all things exclusive and limited this weekend.

Fashion Denver 2008 was May 10.

I got this:

Meet Vickie.††

Note Vickie's lush curves^...

...sleek rings and grommets@...

...and her optimistic‡‡ silver lining.

[SUMMARY: There's something about Vickie...]

You may wish to find your own Vickie, a Vickie you can bring home with you.

You can't have your own Vickie.

[SUMMARY: Nya-nya-ny-nya-nyah§§]

Not yet, anyway.

If you go to the Vamp Bags site and look at their bags, you will note not a Vickie in sight.¶¶

See, Vickie's part of the new line. Vickie was available for pre-ordering. When I went to pre-order my very own Vickie, it turned out they had one extra sample.

And they sold it to me.

So I currently have the only Vickie (2008) in the wild.

Vamp Bags are showing up on the red carpet, on Joan Rivers,+ generally on the fashionista radar. My complete Vickie collection could be big some day. Sotheby's will court me, my retirement will be secure, I will finally be acknowledged as the advance troop& on the leading edge of fashion.$

[SUMMARY: Sucker for elitism, active fantasy life.]

Some day, I will tell my grandchildren about this.##

FOOTNOTE (crossed): And if you don't remember, I'm happy to get all self-referential on your ass.

FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): ibid.

§FOOTNOTE (swerved): I didn't mention this even though I know how it warms the cockles of your liberal little hearts.

FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): ibid.

%FOOTNOTE (percented): Y'know... think globally, shop locally.

#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Oh, clap your hands, children! Clap with all your might and say, "I do! I do believe in cocktails!"

††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): Funny little side story: the Vamp bag I bought last year was also Vickie. Vickie the First. Vickie I looks like this:

Only mine is green. Apparently, I have more of a thing for rings than I thought. Some day I'll tell you the "I don't like diamonds and I swallow" story and you'll understand what a revelation this is for me.

^FOOTNOTE (careted): I like to pretend Vickie and I have a lot in common.

@FOOTNOTE (atted): ibid.

‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): OK, OK... so I'm pushing the metaphor. I *like* the metaphor. But it's also practical. I love purses with light-coloured linings so I can see my stuff when I open them.

§§FOOTNOTE (ring around the Vickie): sp?

¶¶FOOTNOTE (one foot in front of the other): Keeping in mind that if you're reading this in 2012, there may be a hundred Vickies at the Vamp site. But rest assured, on May 12, 2008, there was just my Vickie and a sample. Nya.

+FOOTNOTE (plussed): To-may-to, to-mah-to.

&FOOTNOTE (ampersanded): One. One troop.


##FOOTNOTE (pounded like the point... I'm driving that point right home): Well, I'll tell *your* grandchildren. I won't have any grandchildren. But won't that be fun? "I dare you to knock on door of the old AntiM house. Legend says she comes to the door all dressed in black and makes the little children listen to stories of purses and cocktails..."

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