Monday, April 7, 2008

Like Getting My Yarbles Slammed in a Car Door

From: Marin
To: The Spelling Bee Champ
Subject: Hey, Spelling Bee Champ
Date: Tue, 08 Apr 2008 00:02:39 +0000

Hi, Champ!

It's me, Marin!

Perhaps I should misspell something so I can be sure you know who I am.

Ever since I got your email address from Sarah, I've been rolling a bunch of cute and coy stuff around in my head with an eye to enticing you to get in touch with me.

Oh! And clever -- can't believe I forgot clever. I do clever pretty well.

Anyway, after a few weird attempts, I've decided on straight and (relatively) to the point:

I really enjoyed your company spelling bee night. I think you're cute, smart, funny -- y'know, all those sweet things the Playboy centrefolds are always looking for in a guy. You also laid some memorable kisses on me and... wow.

I'd like to spend more time with you and see if the chemistry bears out (and maybe get another kiss or twelve if it seems the right thing to do). You may feel the same. Then again, you may have been drunk on Jager shots or the giddy triumph of your spelling bee win and felt different in the sober light of day.

Either way, thanks for the good company and the great kisses.

You have my email address. My home phone is [some seven-digit number]. If you'd like to make a date, please do get in touch. If not, could you please take a minute to tell me "no" so I don't waste any time checking to see if my phone has a dial tone?

Yours in spelling accuracy (so long as it's not French),

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