Monday, January 12, 2009

Revolutionary Resolutions

Every year when January 1 rolls in, I experience resolution anxiety.

Are resolutions stupid and cheesy?

Is it dumb to put such emphasis on one day of the year, to put all your self-improvement eggs in one icy basket, to guppy up to the lemming-like rush of the masses toward probably failure?

Or is it just a good bookmark, a might-as-well-start-somewhere logical starting point, a touchstone for yourself and all you hope to become?§

[SUMMARY: Attempting to mask procrastination with pretty words.]

Turns out, mostly I just like to play with myself.

Games, I mean.

I was waxing neurotic about all this% Saturday at not-drunken-morning-coffe-shop knitting,# and Betsy†† told me about an exotic new resolution system‡‡:

  1. Take the month of January to settle down from the holidays and get into the swing of things.
  2. Assess your resolution needs and actually start them on February 2 (2/2).
  3. Revisit and revise as needed on 3/3, 4/4, 5/5 and so on.
I would like to say I appreciate this for its sense of balance and it's recognition of me as a work in progress. In the name of honesty, I have to say the number thing appeals to the very minute C part§§ of my OCD tendencies¶¶ and it has a sort of game-like appeal## that really speaks to my inner child.†††

[SUMMARY: Some of us need more to keep our interest than others.]

I thought I would share this with y'all, in case anybody out there is looking for a new way to view resolutions.‡‡‡

And, hey -- if you fall off the wagon, you can always re-start or drop it entirely on your revise and revisit day.

[SUMMARY: Sanctioned waffling!]

If I'm going to buy into self-help, it has to come with an escape route.

I know it's a weak blog day, but tomorrow@... to make it all better... KNITTING!

FOOTNOTE (crossed): Possibly.

FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Probably.

§FOOTNOTE (swerved): Well, yeah... that too.

FOOTNOTE (paragraphed): I only say things like this because you expect me to. Normally, I'm a demure, clean-living, Stepford girl. Who happens to be twelve.

%FOOTNOTE (percented): Not the playing with myself part, the resolutions part.

#FOOTNOTE (pounded): Even I don't drink before 10:00 am. Mostly.

††FOOTNOTE (ddouble-ccrossed): Who doesn't have a blog and may not read blogs and would never know if I didn't give her credit. She didn't make this up and doesn't remember where she heard it, but, by golly, it isn't my idea, so I'm determined to credit someone else. Who's keeping track of my saint points? What am I up to so far?

‡‡FOOTNOTE (doubble-crossssed): New to me. Maybe only exotic to me too.

§§FOOTNOTE (all those fours make my head spin): Which mostly manifests itself in counting things. Ironic, no?

¶¶FOOTNOTE (do those look parallel to you?): I'm sure it comes as no surprise to any of you that I have a tiny little obsessive streak.

##FOOTNOTE (pound that dice popper): If they could work one of those dice popper things in, I'd never look for another way to do resolutions again.

†††FOOTNOTE (or a spinner! With an arrow!): Who needs to be distracted with number games and dice poppers to keep her from taking her clothes off and playing in the neighbour's bird bath.
‡‡‡FOOTNOTE (three track mind): I also recommend squinting and tilting your head to the left.

@FOOTNOTE (atted): Whichever version of tomorrow works for me, that is.

No comments: